Our communication can have many different effects such as stress levels, relationships with others, level of satisfaction with our life, productivity and ability to meet our goals and solve problems. There are two components to effectively communicate verbally. One is to become mindfully present with what you are saying and this also include how you say it; your tone, speech, pitch and volume any your non-verbal communication such as gestures, and body language.  The method in which we share our message is as important as the message itself. The second component is to become an Active Listener. When actively listening to others we use the senses of the body, the feelings of the heart, the logic of the mind and the stillness of the soul.  The practice of active listening, will make your interactions and communications with others more successful.

CR: Sometimes it’s difficult to focus on what others are saying because we are feeling overwhelmed and confused about what is happening. So often we do not hear what is being said because we are already planning and formulating our responses in our minds. Consider practicing active listening.

As we listen to another person, make an effort to focus on the words you hear.

At appropriate times, repeat back what you have heard. Use expressions such as “So you mean” or “What you seem to be saying is.” This technique helps you become consciously aware of what others are saying as well as a better listener.

DS: Active listening helps us give our full attention to another person in our conversations. If we simply nod our heads during conversations, we do not demonstrate that we are truly engaged in the discussion. The process of taking in another person’s words and then saying them back again allows us to comprehend their point of view on a deeper level. Being able to agree on something with another person, involves getting at the heart of their own wants and needs. We need to find how those intersect with our own, and consciously using active listening is one of the most useful ways to do this. Listening to others with awareness will assure that your interactions lead to positive results today.

CR: I agree, by repeating what the other person has said during the conversation, we show that we have heard the message and we understand it.  This enables us through the act of repetition, to make certain that we are able to grasp someone else’s position fully.  This action also smooths the progress of our communications so that they are much more effective. We need to let the other know that we are listening, whether or not we agree with the message fully.

Before responding, it is best to take everything through our heart. Look for a heart opening which could make it easier to compromise with others today.

There is another side to an issue, a different perspective, and we are much more willing to meet other people halfway.

DS: As we learn to listen from the heart mindfully in pure awareness, we are able to stay present. We need to open our heart and bond emotionally with friends, family, professional colleagues and those we interact with daily. Understand that each of us is part of a web of relationships that is nurtured through love, kindness, compassion, empathy and joy.

Seven Ways to Practice Active Listening

1. Hearing is easy! For most of us, our body does the work while interpreting the sound into words. Listening, however is far more difficult.

2. When you are listening, LISTEN. Don’t talk on the phone, text message, clean off your desk or anything else.

3. Avoid interruptions. If you think of something that needs to be done, make a note of it and forget about it until the conversation is over.

4. Aim to spend at least 90% of your time listening and 1-% of your time talking.

5. When you talk, make sure it’s related to what the other person is saying, ask questions to clarify and expand your understanding. Probe for more information if need be.

6. Do not offer advice, unless the other person asks you for it.

7. If you must take notes, ask to do so and do it in a way not to disturb the flow of the conversation.

….Love and Blessings, Christina and Dimitri